Power with Heart News
Right Use of Power Institute

Right Use of Power

power with heart news


Dear <<First Name>>!

Politically this is an intense time in the United States. Right use of power in politics is a very challenging issue. Please see my articles in this issue. May our politicians be courageous and skillful enough to promote attitudes and policies that are for the good of all rather than for the good of the few.

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In this issue you will find:


There are six 3 CE hour courses in the new series:

Overview Course (1 CE hour)--Power with Heart;

Dimension 1--Be Informed and Present, the Guided use of power;

Dimension 2--Be compassionate and Aware, the Conscious use of power;

Dimension 3--Be Connected and Accountable, the Responsible use of power;

Dimension 4--Be Skillful and Proactive, the wise use of power;
*This course deals with Leadership and Power Dynamics, Challenges, and Soul Work and World Service

The More Dimension-- Refining your Personal Impact and Becoming Ethically Proactive. 

There is enough new material that you can take the courses again!  Try it out!.

Find out more about the E-courses here.

Workshops & Trainings

Boulder, Colorado

Right Use of Power Workshop & Teacher Training
April 28 - May 1, 2017

Presented by Cedar Barstow, Magi Cooper, Amanda Aguilera
More information coming soon!

Boulder, Colorado

Right Use of Power Workshop & Teacher Training
July 22-25, 2017

Presented by Cedar Barstow & Magi Cooper
Registration coming soon!

Featured RUP Teacher:
Maya Shaw Gale

Maya Shaw Gale, M.A.,  is an Advanced RUP Teacher, BCC Certified Life Coach and Certified Hakomi Practitioner. Maya is also a published poet and playwright.  Her poem in this newsletter, Standing Together, is dedicated to the Water and Earth Protectors of Standing Rock.  It is one way she is expressing her right use of power in her desire and efforts to support the indigenous voice and wisdom.  As a RUP Teacher she is focusing on bringing the feminine principle back into balance in the marketplace, in leadership, and in social & environmental justice.  She is also working with Cedar on distilling the core concepts of RUP.

Quote of the Month

"The early prophets did not preach the discipline of empathy because it sounded edifying, but because experience showed that it worked.  They discovered that greed and selfishness were the cause of our personal misery.  When we gave them up, we were happier.  Egotism imprisoned us in an inferior version of ourselves and impeded our enlightenment."         - Karen Armstrong

Poem of the Month

by Maya Shaw Gale

Stand like a rock and do not move.
Stand for the Earth and her precious Waters,
for the others don't know that everything is connected
and what affects one will soon affect all.
Stand like a rock and do not move.
Stand for your ancestors whose graves were destroyed.
They have given their lives and their livelihoods, their land,
and now, must they give their dignity too?
Stand like a rock and do not move.
Though they bring in their dogs and their mace
and their machines of destruction.
Stand proud in peace and show the world
what warriors of the spirit can do without force.
Stand like a rock and do not move.
Stand in the heat, in the rain and the winds
and, if necessary, the snows.
The Elementals have come to back you up
and to sing their songs of protest too.
Stand like a rock and do not move.
Your medicine is rising once again through these lands.
May your bodies be like prayer arrows planted in the Earth,
proclaiming the sacredness of all Life, in all forms.
Stand like a rock and do not move.
And know you will not be standing alone.
Your brothers and sisters all over the globe
are gathering in circles to send prayers and blankets
and standing with you in the solidarity of love.
Stand like a rock and do not move.
There is power in numbers and the numbers will grow.
The ancestors are returning, and they are wearing many colors of skin.
Let this cause be a signal for the rainbow tribes to unite.
We are ALL the ones we've been waiting for...
Stand together like rocks and do not move!

How Not To Make An Apology

By Cedar Barstow 

Making a sincere and effective apology is important skill for a wise leader.  Making an authentic apology requires self-awareness and the ability to understand and take responsibility for impact.  

An effective apology would include the elements in BOLD:

1.  What I regret, apologize for, am sorry about (my specific behavior).  This would NOT be:  I'm sorry if I offended anyone.  I have apologized to the American people.  A statement like this doesn’t specifically name how the behavior was harmful.

2.  Who was hurt and how.  This would NOT be:

What I said was not good, but compared to what other people have done, it was nothing.  This statement makes light of the offense and shifts to blame to someone else.

3.  What I have learned.  This would NOT be: This was eleven years ago.

 I respect women.   This sentence does not demonstrate any self-reflection.  People tend to be very generous when they hear sincerely that the offender has truly learned something.  

4.  What I'm doing to make sure this doesn't happen again.  This would NOT be:

My words should not be taken seriously because it was just locker room talk.  Everybody does that.  I have not done anything illegal.  If you are famous, you can do anything you want.   These statements don’t name any effort being made to help people feel safe in the future.  

Rules for Misusing Power
by Cedar Barstow, M.Ed., C.H.T.

This is a high-stakes election in America.  Not only are there two visions of America's future; there are two very different models of how to gain, maintain, and use power.  I'm defining power as neutral:  the ability to have an effect or to have influence.  All of us need to recognize and own the power that we have.  Candidates are in high relief right now because they need to demonstrate that they have the ability to have influence in order to win the right to represent us in government.  

The model of power that the Right Use of Power Institute promotes might be called the socially intelligent model.  It may be defined as "the use of personal and role power and influence to prevent, reduce, resolve, and repair harm, and, in addition, to integrate strength with heart, improve relationships and situations, and promote well-being and the common good" (Barstow, p. 3).  This is a high ideal, to be sure.  In this model, power is gained and maintained through being attuned to and engaged with the needs and interests of both oneself and others.  The cultivation and use of social intelligence requires having humility and empathy, being visionary and pragmatic, understanding complexity, being able to resolve conflicts, allocating resources fairly, and staying informed and attuned, strong and decisive (Barstow, p. 318).  The effectiveness of this socially intelligent model of power use is supported by research (Keltner). 

In contrast, I want to name the strategies used by the other model of power, what could be called the Dominator Model.  We have been guided by the rules of this model for centuries.  Think of Machiavelli.  It was recently put into a more modern form and published as The 48 Laws of Power (Greene).  Here are a few of the strategies found in that book:  

Law 3:  Conceal Your Intentions, 
Law 4:  Always Say Less Than Necessary, 
Law 6:  Court Attention at All Costs, 
Law 7:  Get Others to Do the Work for You, but Always Take the Credit, 
Law 13:  When Asking for Help, Appeal to People's Self-Interest, Never to Their Mercy or Gratitude, 
Law 15:  Crush Your Enemy Totally, 
Law 17:  Keep Others in Suspense: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability
Law 20:  Do Not Commit to Anyone
Law 37:  Create Compelling Spectacles
Law 39:  Stir up Waters to Catch Fish

These are everyday strategies and the results are familiar.  They end up as dramatic and horrifying stories on the front pages of our newspapers and in the nightly news.   These stories of greed, manipulation, betrayal, harm, and exploitation get our emotional attention for better and for worse.  Blasted by distressing news, we can get immune or apathetic to suffering and injustice and lose hope that systems and people can ever change for the better.   News stories of socially intelligent uses of power--treaties, repair efforts, good people doing good work, green organizations, wind and solar power generally receive back-page coverage at best.  

Returning to the rules for misuse of power--in a counter-intuitive way, it can be empowering to know that these painful but familiar laws are not just accidents or mistakes but actual deceptive strategies for gaining and keeping power and control.  Let these laws offer guidance as we assess the model of power candidates are using so that we can vote for the socially intelligent users of power.   In the process of casting our vote we may also help to disempower the dominant model for use of power.

Barstow, Cedar. (2015). Right Use of Power:  The Heart of Ethics. Boulder, CO: Many Realms Publishing.
Keltner, Dacher.  (????). Greater Good, 4(3), and other articles and research. Retrieved from here.
Greene, Robert. (2002). The 48 Laws of Power (Concise Edition). London: Profile Books Ltd. 

What Should You Choose: Time or Money?

By Hal E. Hershfield and Cassie Mogilner Holmes in The New York TImes

Given the choice between more time or more money, which would you pick? For a beach vacation, you might pay more for a direct flight to gain a couple of extra hours getting sand between your toes. On the other hand, you might take a better-paying job that requires late nights at the office.
One of us, Professor Hershfield, recently faced such a choice. He was invited to teach a weekend seminar out of state. But he had a baby girl at home, born 12 weeks earlier. The pay would offset the costs of child care, but the job would require two days of not oohing, aahing and bonding with the baby.

The value of the money was easy to quantify. But it was harder to put a value on the amount of time that would be lost with the family. He determined that there were only 222 weekends left before the baby would start kindergarten, when quality family hours would give way to car pools to friends’ houses.

Which would lead to greater happiness — the money or the time? 

For a research project, we put this question to more than 4,000 Americans of different ages, income levels, occupations and marital and parental status. In a paper in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science, which we wrote with our student Uri Barnea, we found that most people valued money more than time. Sixty-four percent of the 4,415 people we asked in five surveys chose money.

Read the rest of the article here.


by Robert Reich

What are the five basic principles of patriotism -- and how do they differ from Trumpism?
Watch the video here.
The Leader’s Journey: A Retreat for Renewal

Friday, December 2, 2016 - Sunday, December 4, 2016

St. Andrew's House Retreat & Conference Center - Union, WA

This is a retreat offered by one of our RUP teachers, Cliff Penwell. While not a RUP training, you might be interested in it's compatible offering.

The leader’s journey can be exciting and exhausting, lonely and lifelong. We’d like to invite you to participate in a retreat that offers an occasion to pause and reflect on the deeper questions that arise in the leader’s journey, questions that may be arising in your journey.The Leader’s Journey will provide a safe place in the company of kindred travelers to pause and disconnect from the technology and pace that a leader’s life demands, to name the season you’re currently in, and reflect on its particular challenges and opportunities.
The retreat’s facilitators have been prepared by theCenter for Courage & Renewal to offer retreats based on the Circle of Trust® approach, including time and space for contemplation as individuals and in small groups, the use of poetry and stories, journaling, and silence. You will listen and be listened to – without performance evaluation, ego or attention to status—and encounter ways to strengthen your own capacity for self-renewal. There will also be space and time to rest and enjoy the serenity of St. Andrew’s House, overlooking the beautiful Olympic Mountains and Hood Canal in Union, Washington.

For more information click here.

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