Monthly suggestion: Is this emotion making you feel inadequate?
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Or why we try not to be ourselves.

Hi EFTer,

I think many of us don't even know how much shame runs our lives. We don't realize how often we are stopped from being our best, most authentic selves because of this feeling inside.

We discussed this emotion on a mentoring call not long ago and once it was brought up and named I was able to look at my own life and see where it appears for me.

Each one of us will find it in different places depending on our life experiences.

Children with Dunce Caps
Shame as Identity:
Childhood Trauma
Sometimes we've taken on feelings of shame about who we are because of early childhood trauma. When this has been driving our behaviours for more yeas than we can remember, it can be so hard to let it go.

This level of shame is best approached by working with a coach or therapist highly trained in trauma as it often requires going deeply into the difficult memories that formed the identity in the first place.

We can cleanse and heal our deepest beliefs about ourselves, even the worst shame, with persistence and EFT:
(Warning: this link contains mentions of abuse and may trigger high emotion! Please be responsible for your own well-being when deciding whether to read this or not):
Short Guy, Tall Guy
Red-Hair and Freckles

Shame About Stuff that's Not Our Choice
Do you have the "right" hair colour? Were you born with a disability? Is your sexual orientation the "correct" one for the people who matter to you? Did you have a family member with an alcohol or drug problem? Do you have shame or embarrassment around these or other situations? 

These are not things that can be controlled or changed. This is simply reality, the hand we were dealt, and there's no need to suffer from it. In fact, there is often a gift to be discovered but we need to remove the shame to see it.

This is a great tap-along audio from Lindsay Kenney on bundling the feelings around this type of problem and tapping them all away:

Image - Beer Bottle Fiasco

Shame About The Choices We've Made
Yep! Sometimes we do stuff that we later wish we hadn't and we look back and cringe with embarrassment at ourselves, our actions.

We can't go back. In truth, only self forgiveness can help us move forward, allowing us to make more informed decisions the next time around.

To complete the picture, with his heart wide open, Gene Monterastelli leads us through some tapping rounds in this video which addresses this part of our shame puzzle:

Personal Growth Resources

Personal Growth Resourse Page
I've finally got this up and running on my website. I've listed a few other holistic healing tools that I find particularly useful and a bunch of books that I've read which were helpful on my personal healing journey. I guess my hope is that you'll find something there that will guide you to your next step:

As I mentioned above, shame can be a big issue. If you'd like some guidance in removing it from your life, feel free to drop me an email. Maybe I can give you some suggestions on how to tackle it. I'd love to help you break free.



Tapping Points Figure
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Vision Boards

Sat., May 31st

1:00 - 4:00PM

Spiritual Science Fellowship (SSF)
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An Afternoon of Tapping & Drumming

Sat., June 21st

1:00AM - 4:00PM

Angel Friend Monica (South Glengarry, ON)
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